I suppose I could wait until after Sunday to post a blog on this topic and yet I need to vent about it now. Our first Sunday back to church with Ian, we went to the bishop's office so that I could be set apart for my new calling. I should have known we would be asked to speak in sacrament. That in and of itself isn't bad, we are all asked to speak at some point or another. The part I am struggling with is the topic.
The only guidelines we were given is to have be based on the last year of our lives. Am I wrong to want to speak on something more "normal"? Like say baptism, or temple work? I guess I am just so ready to move on from last year, even though we still have a bit to go... By no means am I angry or mad... more than anything I feel a huge weight, like somehow I am supposed to be this example of strength, fortitude and somehow know all the secrets to being faithful, trusting, enduring and have the power to now walk on water. I feel unworthy of the praise and admiration of our bishop. I don't want to let anyone down. Truthfully, I don't believe Mike and I have done anything miraculous. We love our son, we love our family and we love the gospel and our Savior. Most people we know, feel the same way. So what makes us the authority on being strong through adversity? We certainly don't have a monopoly on suffering and despair or adversity.
I have written my talk, and I will be speaking on faith in adversity and enduring to the end. I feel pretty good about the topic choice... I pray Heavenly Father helps me say the things that he wants them to hear. Mostly I am grateful for the chance I have to study and learn as I prepare to speak on Sunday.
6 comments:
"Truthfully, I don't believe Mike and I have done anything miraculous. We love our son, we love our family and we love the gospel and our Savior."
That is a great topic! I love it. I'd go with the angle that we are just normal people who had adversity but were supported through our faith, Savior's Love, and the ward's love. That's my two sense.
Holy Cow woman, you don't need to put a "talk together" just pull some of your post within the last year and read them.
Your humility is astounding, but really...are you trying to say that you have no idea how your experience has touched lives.
Leah, what your family went through was more difficult than anyone could even try to imagine, but your strength, your testimony, your courage, and your bravery has been such an inspiration to me.
Yes you were "just being a mom." But to Ian you were his strength, his soft place to fall during this time, and his reason to fight!
Many people in your ward may not be aware of how truly you were touched by the blessings you and Ian were given in Mtn Home. They may not truly understand, what it means to "Let the Lord Guide." You are the perfect example for this.
Yes you are just a normal person, and I am pretty sure you are burnt out on the last full year. But like any missionary experience we are asked to speak...teach...and help guide those.
Who knows, someone may be struggling right now with something and it might take your talk, your personality, your grace, to teach them "Who Really is Incharge."
Whatever you choose to talk on, may I request you post it on your blog, I would love to read it.
Just my opinion!
I think your feeling of wanting a more "normal" topic is totally valid. It's also a lot more narrow when they actually give you a topic.
I also think the others are right in what they have shared. I don't even know you very well, but I know that your experience has shaped your testimony. I cannot imagine the feelings of helplessness you have felt, but I KNOW that your faith has helped you in ways you probably cannot even express.
It's important to remember that the speaker usually gets more out of the talk than anyone else. If you learned something about yourself, than it is already a success.
Wow! You are handling it better then I probably would. I see your point as to wanting a normal topic. I also know that we are encouraged to share personal stories in class lessons and discussions because you never know who your story may help or uplift. I'm sure you and your family have grown even closer to the Savior and realized the importence of the small things more since enduring the past year. I know I tend to take for granted what I have and know I should show more appreciation for what my Heavenly Father has given me. I know that hearing of others adversities and trials I am able to put my own life into perspective and am touched to be 'more Christlike'. I know you guys will do an awesome job whatever specific topic you end up focusing on, it comes down to your testimony of the gospel that can have the biggest impact on you and those in the congregation. Best of luck my friend. You are definately a great example of faith, strength and a loving Mother to me and I'm grateful to know you and your sweet family!
You will do amazing! Don't stress about it - it's only a mere 15 minutes of your life! You've learned so much in the past year, so just share it with those who need to be touched and who need to have a little more faith in their lives. Maybe others in your ward just need to hear that their lives are pretty easy compared to some and to be grateful for the trials they have. You rock, sister, so don't worry about it. I hope you blog again on Sunday to let us all know how it went. Good luck! :)
Well, I was gonna say all that your other friends have said, so now I don't need to :) Or you can just not show up, thus demonstrating how unpredictable your life is :))) but that wouldn't be obedient :)
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